help

Wanting to help

In wanting to support our loved ones we often offer “helpful advice.”  “You should try this.”  “Do it this way.”  We mean well, we really do want to help, but often our “helpful advice” and our good intentions simply piss-off the other person.   Bear and Butterfly In my book, Bear and Butterfly I examine …

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The software of doubt

Have you run a system scan on your thinking looking for software of doubt?  For most of us it is there, just like a brain virus. Brain virus does not have to mean something like meningitis.  Brain virus can also mean catching the disease of “I can’t.” Just like your computer Just as your computer …

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Change me?

You changing me is not possible.  Me changing you is not possible.  We cannot change anyone else, only ourselves.  Think back over your lifetime,  has there been someone you have known you could help, if only they would behave the way you wanted them to?  If your relationship with this person is good, do you …

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Paranoia

As the old saying goes; when everyone is out to get you paranoia is just common sense.  Paranoia can be very destructive in our lives, causing us to question everyone and every thing leaving us no safe place to rest our minds.  Now, if you can get your mind around the idea that everyone is …

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Angels Among Us

Where do you come down on the question of Angels among us?  Do you believe there are heavenly bodies with wings and glowing auras hovering around us?  Do you perhaps believe there are unseen messengers and protectors who guide our actions?  Or are you one of the people who believe that there are angels walking …

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Try and try again

“If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again.”  How many times have you heard this sage advice during your lifetime?  There have been times when someone has said this to me and I have gotten sooooo frustrated.  “I have tried, and tried, and tried again and still its not working! Though my own …

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Crazy is as Crazy does

What is crazy?  Is crazy taking a chance on a new way of doing things?  Is crazy stepping into a new relationship when the last relationship went so badly, is crazy simply seeing other people as simply living their experience as best as they can without wanting to “help” them do it “right?” People with …

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A different perspective

Have you ever tried to see something another person told you was there, like a dolphin swimming by in the ocean, but could not see it until you looked just a little off to the side of where it was? Once you spotted the dolphin out of the corner of your eye, you could then …

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Save Yourself

A huge percentage of the American population has been on a commercial airline flight.  One of the early instructions is always, “if you are traveling with a child or disabled person, place the air mask on yourself first, then assist the other person.  This is not an example of “lifeboat ethics”, it is a statement …

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After the But…

We can sing and dance around a topic, trying to avoid expressing a judgement, still, whatever we say after the word “but” is our real message. Have you ever noticed how peoples voices even change right before they get to what they want to say, bust before the “but” appears?  The words drag out a …

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