Fall In Love

Falling in love is one of the most wonderful things we experience; the chills and thrills of those first few weeks when everything is right with the world…..grand indeed.

Then too often we find ourselves falling out of love just as quickly and as dramatically, which is not fun. Why does this happen, and why does this happen time and time again?  Because we are often falling in love with what we want to see, falling in love with the idea of love rather than experiencing true love. How do we break this cycle?

The surest way to find lasting love is to make the first person with whom you fall in love yourself!  Not in a creepy self-centered way, I mean coming to love who you are in all your strength and what you might call weakness.  When we fall in love with someone in an attempt to complete ourselves or make up for our own short-comings the attraction quickly fades because no one else can make up for what we feel is lacking in ourselves.

We tend to be attracted to those whom we perceive to have qualities we ourselves do not have and wish we did have; a particular physical appearance; a quick wit, or (dare we say it) money.  These traits seem attractive at first, then we find ourselves resenting their presence in our new relationships because they remind us of our own feeling of lack.

If you are looking for a long term relationship first fall in love with who and what you are.  Yes you will change and grow in so many ways over the years together, many of those changes fueled by your relationship, but bring something to the table as you enter into a loving relationship; a true love of yourself. 

The Involved Observer