Anger is fear turned inside-out

There, that is the whole message of this blog.

OK, I admit it, I am weak, I simply have to expound on this thought.

At times in the past I have been able to generate really, really good anger at other people.  I was completely justified  in my anger, I had tangible evidence to support my anger, I could produce 8X10 glossy prints to support my anger, but what it all came down to at the end of the day was what was really going on was fear within myself.

 I might have seemed angry that someone pulled in front of me, what was really going on was I was afraid of a collision.

I may have seemed angry at my wife, but the true story was I was afraid I would have to admit my own culpability that had me acting out.

I may have appeared angry when my children walked into the street without looking both ways, but what I was responding to was a fear they might get hurt.

The next time you find yourself acting in an angry manner, give yourself a gift, listen to yourself: what fear is this anger reveling? What part of you is looking to be defended?  I have found very few times when my anger was really about what it appeared to be about.

So, in a way, we see that anger is (within reason) actually a helper.  It helps us recognize what is going on inside ourselves. The key, then, is to listen when we get the hint something is ready to be released, some old behavior changed, and then do something about releasing that thing or those things before they come back to harm us.  

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