Want to really run a relationship into the ground? Say “I told you so.” It really doesn’t matter if you were completely right, saying “I told you so” is a relationship being killed slowly.
No one likes being reminded they made an error, so the response, be it spoken or unspoken, is uniformly negative. The question you get to ask yourself is “do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy?”
Many of us have lived in an atmosphere of “I told you so,” therefore saying this phrase is second nature. But now we want to stop saying it, we want to stop poisoning our relationships but we don’t know how, the words slip out so naturally. What can we do?
As with any habit, change is possible, but it takes some effort. Right now promise yourself this phrase will no longer leave your mouth, under any circumstances. Next time you feel those words coming to your lips just stop, pinch your lips together if you must. One or two times of being conscious of refraining from saying the words and you will actually hear yourself beginning to think of saying that phrase and you will take pause. Instead you might hear yourself saying “I was concerned that might happen,” which is a step in the right direction, and before you know it, the urge to poison your relationships by aggrandizing yourself will change completely.
This is simply another way you can begin to experience the Involved Observer process I write about in It’s All About Me, and I invite you to explore other ways to IN-power your life; to stop living the life someone else has lived and begin to live your life YOUR way, as you, bringing the one thing to the table no one else can bring; you.
