The Father figure, in our society tends to be viewed as the aloof disciplinarian. Father, or men, have been taught that displaying affection is forbidden. As a consequence, men think they have to avoid displays of love. The roots of this idea go far back in our DNA. So far we no longer take time to examine why, or if this is how we want to be. Learning to change this emotional trap takes some real dedication.
Where to begin.
As I explain in my book Bear and Butterfly, much of this disconnect begins with our basic communication styles. Butterflies seek to establish community, they are the nurturing vibration. Bears are basically lone-wolves, trained to fend for themselves and protect the family unit. This dynamic was once essential to our survival. As times have evolved the role of the Father has been frozen in this long-ago place. Where we begin is questioning the need to continue living in this framework. My viewpoint is; no, it is not in our best interest to continue this way.
Learning a new way.
Regardless of our gender identification, those people who identify as Bear not only feel powerless to show emotion, society makes it difficult to do so. Butterflies (again, regardless of gender) are forced into roles as the emotional support. Often times they do not seek, nor do they desire this responsibility. Many women do not want to, or are not capable of, fulfilling their assigned role. Does this make them wrong? Not at all. They are simply listening to their inner guidance which tells them otherwise. In either case, a new way of living can be learned. This is where Bear and Butterfly comes in. In these pages you will read about stereotypes. You will clearly see how others expect us to be. From this point changes can occur. Butterflies can draw upon the wonderful tendencies of Bears, and visa-versa.
You don’t have to be either one.
In our highest and best expression each of us draws upon the strongest callings of both Bear and Butterfly. A man can be soft, loving and supportive and still be a man. A woman can be strong, brief and decisive without being considered a B…h. Learning from each other is a powerful position.
Read Bear and Butterfly to find out how. Begin by clicking on the cover below, read a sample, then order your own copy from Amazon.com.
